• About
• Advertise
• Contact Us
• Polls

New Relationship Dos and Don’ts

conversation
Have normal, get-to-know-you conversations. Talking incessantly about how you feel and how great things are going between the two of you is nothing short of obnoxious. It projects a certain amount of immaturity that repels the good dates and attracts the wrong ones.

Pressure
Pressuring your date to do anything is a big no-no. Once again, it is a sign of relationship immaturity as well as personal immaturity. You could beg your date to go to church with your family on Sunday or argue good reasons to stay the night with you — the nature of your pressuring doesn’t matter. What matters is that you are selfishly disrespecting your date’s boundaries. If a relationship starts off with one person pressing on the other’s limits or preferences, there are bound to be loads of regret by the end of it.

Taking Hints
Pay attention to the clues your date is giving you. They may be inviting more intimacy, they may be trying to show you where their boundaries are, or they may be trying to subtly tell you that you’ve got dragon breath. Either way, you want to know, so pay attention. If you aren’t sure, ask; it is a far better option than making the wrong assumption.

Texts and Phone Calls
Refrain from over-calling/texting to keep things light and friendly. Remember the guidelines for conversation even when texting. The “I miss you” text every day when you only just met is really annoying. Not until you are an “official” couple is it appropriate to text or call to talk about your emotions or anything sexual. Don’t call or text to tell them how nice their butt looked the night before. Save that sort of flattery for when you are in the moment, and even then, use it sparingly because it can easily be construed as trashy and rude. What you should focus on is getting to know the other person and letting them get to know you. Think of it this way… After every message or every phone conversation, the other person is going to mull over it in their mind and might even talk about it with a friend. They will dismantle every word you said and search for more meaning behind the words.

Honesty
Everybody wants to put their best foot forward in a new dating relationship, but don’t pretend to be someone you are not. In turn, watch for warning signs that your date isn’t all they seem to be. Dishonesty, especially misrepresenting themselves, is a big red flag that shouldn’t be ignored. When you do get a clue that there are major differences in areas like spirituality, family, social ethics, or politics, be honest with yourself about the possibility of being truly happy with them. You are looking for a match and so are they.

Gut Instincts
Listen to your gut. If you hear the little alarms going off inside of you, pay attention to them. It is easy to brush your feelings to the side in an effort to fall in love, but when you ignore your instincts over and over again, it gets more difficult to recognize when they are trying to alert you. Most of the time, later on in a relationship or a while after a relationship, one can look back and see the exact time during the first few weeks (many times in the first couple of days) that they had a gut feeling about their date and it turned out to be right.

Judgment
Don’t be too quick to judge. Sometimes it is wise to look at yourself just as critically during a new relationship. For instance, if you are often turned off by how little men spend on you when they take you out, perhaps it is your value system that needs a check-up rather than theirs.

Maintaining Your Self
Don’t drop everything else in your life. It is common, especially for women, to forget about themselves and take on the identity of their partners. That is the consequence of bad past relationships and lack of positive relationship role models. You can prevent losing yourself in a new relationship by keeping the things that matter to you a part of your daily life. Things like journaling, reading, exercising, and spending time with friends and family, all the things that help to keep you a healthy, balanced person, should remain high on your priority list. Make a point to enjoy the same things you normally do, even in the first weeks of a new romance.

Lowering the Bar
Keep your standards high. Don’t talk yourself into being okay with something that you aren’t. Settling is a sure way to get yourself into a miserable relationship. Do you remember the last time you said to yourself, “I should have known when they… ?” If you aren’t sure what your standard is, make a list of all the things you want in a partner. If your date doesn’t fit the bill, don’t waist your precious time.

Planning and Paying
It is a great idea to trade off date planning and date funding. Not to say that it should be a regulated arrangement of every other date or anything, but stepping away from the traditional system of men planning and paying for all dates can be a lot of fun and make it easier to get to know each other. Taking control of the rendezvous enables you to surprise them, impress them, and romance them. In addition, you can learn a lot about them by switching roles.

Alcohol Consumption
The general rule is to stay relatively sober for at least the first month of dating someone. Getting sloshy drunk anytime in those first few weeks is likely to be your kiss of death. They will undoubtedly see you at your worst and redeeming yourself from that is not an easy feat.

Meeting Friends, Family, and the Ex Ease your new love interest into your social circles. Start off by introducing them to a few select friends, particularly those who help you “screen” prospective mates. An introduction to family members, especially parents, and ex’s, even if they are still a part of your life, shouldn’t happen until you are at least approaching a month of dating. Why? Besides being a little weird and moving too fast, you want to wait because it takes a while to establish comfort levels in social situations. This will give you time to learn to recognize each other’s cues and know enough about each other that an “inner circle” situation isn’t uncomfortable.

Keeping Your Distance
Don’t overwhelm them with attention. Don’t invite yourself over more than once a week, and don’t smother them with physical affection when you are together. You may feel the urge to reach out and touch their sweet face over and over again, but refrain because it is uncomfortable. Men and women often make the mistake of jumping into “couple” behaviors like smooching, holding hands, using terms of endearment, and touching them in sexual ways too soon and scaring off their dates. I will again reiterate that getting to know someone for who they are as an individual should be the focus of a new relationship. Too often, people get caught up in the romance before realizing how little they actually know about their partner.

Skeletons
Everybody has their dirty little secrets, and it wouldn’t be good for you to go telling them to every person you date, but you might want to drop a hint here and there to test the waters. In those first couple of weeks, be as honest as you would like them to be with you. For some couples, after a few dates and things are going well, it could help to discuss the fact that you both have pasts and that you should share them later on down the road. Just make sure that when that one month mark (or comparable milestone) comes around, you let them know some of the details of the skeletons you alluded to. Otherwise, they become secrets that will surely hinder your relationship.

The Biggest Mistakes Women Make in a relationship

Many times when men pull away, women are left wondering “What happened? What went wrong? Was it something I said? Something I did?” They agonize and replay last conversations and meetings over and over.

The biggest mistake women make is not understanding how men think and feel. The very things they do to try to fix a relationship actually make the situation worse! Here are articles with proven advice on what NOT to do.

First Date No No’s

The very fact that a guy asks you for a date means that you have already made a good impression.

Because of this, you don’t have to impress him; rather, your main focus should be to NOT do these 3 things….

Don’t Send Your Ex that email (article by Mimi Tanner)

When a man has stopped contacting you, should you send him an email telling him that you have moved on?

Recently I heard from a woman who is in this exact situation. Here’s what she wrote…

When it Comes to Relationships, Patterns Don’t Lie

Many men and women know the definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result. Yet in spite of this knowledge, they continue to date or marry the same type of person while expecting a different result…

Why Susan Dates Bad Boys

For the past five years Susan has been on a dating rollercoaster. Each guy she dates has two identical qualities; they are always exciting and eventually treat her like dirt…

Why Relationships Are Difficult

As I have mentioned in previous articles, if you have suffered any type of injury or trauma as a child, your brain and heart have an overriding goal for you. They will protect you at any cost – even if that method of protection causes you pain and loneliness…

What NOT to do if your Partner Leaves

As a therapist, I regularly counsel men and women who are suffering from a broken heart. They tearfully plead their sincerity. Unfortunately, their fear often takes the lead of their focus. They would rather get their own way versus doing the right thing…

Three Mistakes women Make that Cause Men to leave – FREE REPORT

Nowadays, there seems to be a widespread epidemic of men leaving women with whom they used to have a good relationship. The reason men leave is rarely what the woman thinks it is…

Muslim Wedding

Although many Muslims stage a multiday celebration to mark a wedding, the traditional marriage ritual itself, called a nikah in Arabic, is simple and brief. It generally follows these steps:

At the wedding, which can take place pretty much anywhere, the bride and groom are separated in different rooms. They may or may not be able to see each other, depending on how conservative the families are.

An officiant, who can be any man familiar with Islamic law, heads to each room separately. There he asks the spouses-to-be if they consent to the marriage and if they are marrying of their own free will (a representative called a wali answers the officiant’s questions on the bride’s behalf).

The couple signs the marriage contract or license, with witnesses observing.

The officiant brings the pair together and pronounces them husband and wife.

A Muslim Wedding Celebration

Days of lively parties often surround the nikah, and that’s just what Shaila Khan plans for her wedding. In her Pakistani culture, Khan explains, marriage becomes a big issue once a girl hits post-college age, and women are often expected to wed within their own ethnicity. Khan’s Mr. Right happens to be from Pakistan, and she admits that his background helps prevent conflict. “It’s nice to have someone understand who I am and where I come from,” says Khan, a New York investment analyst in her mid-20s. “And I don’t have to worry about my family accepting him.” Though far from a typical South Asian, Khan now finds herself looking forward to a typical Pakistani wedding, featuring a week of singing and dancing, including the following events:

Dholki: The wedding celebrations begin with the dholki (named after the dholk, or drum) one to two weeks before the actual three-day wedding ceremony. During this event, young guests sing and dance while beating on the dholk.

The bride and groom traditionally hold their own dholki. Friends and family gather at their respective houses to practice songs and dances for the upcoming mehendi ceremony during the week of the wedding. “There’s usually a whole week of back-to-back dholkis before a wedding. I’ve had so much fun attending them in the past,” Khan says. “It’s just an excuse to get together with friends and family to dance.” The women closest to either the bride or groom usually choreograph the dances, and it’s mostly women who perform. The couple’s families prepare dinner for the revelers, and the party goes late.

Mehendi: The mehendi ceremony takes place on the first night of the three-day wedding. Usually the most festive part of the event, it’s filled with noise and color, with women dressed in bright formal shalwar kameez outfits and saris, and with unmarried girls sporting long skirts and blouse outfits called lehengas. The mehendi can either be held separately for the bride and groom or jointly. A joint mehendi lends to friendly guy/girl competition while each side takes turns to outdo the other. In more conservative families, the women are kept separated from the men.

The bride traditionally wears a formal yellow outfit, and, as the name of the ceremony implies, has wet mehendi (henna paint) applied on her hands that day. “The bride, along with all the women on both sides of the family, has henna designs put on her hands and sometimes her feet,” Khan says. “It’s basically a bridal shower, but a lot more colorful. It’s definitely my favorite part of the wedding festival and I plan on having a lot of fun on mine.”

It’s customary for the bride to be escorted onto the stage under a yellow color dupata, or large scarf, held up by six female relatives or friends. Her head is covered and bowed, and she doesn’t have much makeup or jewelry on at this event. In joint mehendi ceremonies the groom arrives at the ceremony after the bride with his entourage of guests, called the baraat. The baraat typically plays loud songs while entering the ceremony hall and is greeted by two parallel lines of the bride’s family and friends.

Nikah: The main wedding day is less eventful than the preceding days. The bride typically wears a bright-red ghaagra, a heavily pleated skirt with a long blouse embroidered in gold. The dupata is hung low over her bowed head and wrapped around her shoulders in such a way that her heavy gold jewelry is not hidden. This outfit is the most elaborate of all the ones the bride will wear. “With all the gold the bride wears on her wedding day, she looks and feels like a queen,” Khan says.

Grooms either wear a traditional sherwani with a turban or a Western-style suit. Some grooms wear a veil of roses on their head before the bride enters. As a game, sometimes the bride’s young female relatives and friends will steal the groom’s shoes, returning them only when the groom pays a bargained amount of money. At the end of the night, a procession escorts the couple to the wedding car and throws flower petals on the couple.

Valima: The groom’s family hosts the valima, or the feast, the night after the wedding. The feast signifies the consummation of the wedding, and is roughly equivalent to an American wedding reception. “Pakistani food is very rich and heavy, so that truly makes for a real feast,” Khan says.

sikh wedding

 the wedding ambiance is set a week before the wedding. There are various rituals, which are followed before and after the wedding. Shagun or engagement is the first ceremony to mark the beginning of the wedding celebration. On this occasion the two families exchange gifts to conform the engagement. Among the pre wedding rituals engagement is the occasion where both the families meet and the bride’s father takes care of all the ceremonial activities on this day. Various auspicious items are required on this day that includes coconut, dry dates, sugar and money and these are sent to the groom’s family.

Wedding on Cruises

We have seen that most of the people, who want to make t

heir marriage memorable and luxurious, arrange marriages at palaces or at 5 star hotels. This has become common nowadays and so arranging marriages at same venue does not mean anything special. So, in order to plan out marriages differently, marriages on cruises are being planned by many people. It really makes the wedding look ver

y different if it takes place on a cruise because one can 

as well imagine that how nice it would be if the couple ex

changed their wedding vows on a cruise ship. It is sure that if a marriage is held onboard then it will be an unforgettable memory for the couple. 

The most special feature of arranging marriages on cruises is that the marriages become unforgettable and the memories remain embedded in their hearts forever. More and more tally of marriages on cruises, more cruises will be coming forward to conduct marriage onboard. So, the people who are planning to have their marriage done onboard will have more choice to choose.

Arranged Marriages

Concept of arranged marriages is very common in India . No matter how modern and developed India might have become , most of the Indian weddings are still arranged ones in the 21st century . In ancient India, child marriages took place and from then, the custom of arranged marriages started. Arranged weddings are usually arranged by the family members of the bride and the groom. The girl and the boy meet and then decide if they would want to get married.

Rituals and customs vary depending on the caste and religion of the two parties. India has various religions and castes with everyone following different rituals and customs. Arranged marriages in India are synonymous to the Indian culture and society. In arranged marriages, the girl and bride don’t know each other well before wedding. These weddings have been successful traditions in Indian culture. One can find an ideal match for arranged weddings in newspapers, matrimonial websites, relatives or friends. People practice various customs and rituals for arranged marriages, although every tradition has a different set of customs that are to be followed.

Arranged weddings have stood to be an important factor in upholding the cultural diversity of India. These days, people prefer arranged marriages to the other types of marriages . If the family of bride and groom agree with the wedding, then they plan a wedding program and follow the relevant customs

Love Marriages

Since the ancient period, there is abundance of instances where it is evident that love marriages have been taking place in spite of the restrictive measures taken by the ancient Indian society. However, it was looked upon a taboo to express such feelings from unmarried men and women towards each other. Nowadays it is believed that happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love. Love is a dream and marriage is a reality. And when both dream and reality gets unified, it is the best thing that can happen to an individual.

Indian love marriages have both pros and cons. This kind of marriages gives us enough time to know the person and then decide about the idea to spend the entire life. The couples can understand each other in a better way. However, if the couples start behaving in a way that is unacceptable for each other, it becomes difficult for them to adjust to this. And later on after marriage when they behave the way they are it becomes difficult for us to accept. But if the love is true, then love marriages nurture love with every passing day. So if one wants to make the love marriage a successful one, then the marriage should be given some more time and commitment and then one can see it blooming.